Tirza ~ May 25

 

Making the bed

 

There was a military officer I read about who waxed poetic about the value of making the bed in the morning.  Something about starting his day having control over the one thing in the day he can have control over.  Everything else can go kablooey, but at least his bed is made.   And I can so well imagine the bed of a military man: spartan, the sheets pulled down and corners tucked tight.  

It was when I began to Airbnb rooms in my house, after my brother’s devastation of the family’s finances, that I really learned how to make a bed properly to look clean, neat and oh, so inviting.  The throw folded just so against the bottom of the bed for the impromptu nap, the pillows plumped and piled in perfectly mismatched cases.  

And one day, I watched a guest who had brought in the farm strawberries to eat on the private deck to her room, looking out at the expanse of mountain and sky, reading what could only be a favorite book, that I was overcome with envy.  That's the life I wanted!  And so, it began.

I think it’s the only place I allow myself to be a perfectionist.  

But a perfectionist whose aesthetic is a relaxed unmilitary look, permitting a blanket to show under a coverlet for a layered coziness.  After all, it's for me. So, perhaps not entirely a perfectionist – maybe more a devotee to bedding.  I love white sales and soft sheets.  For a break, I’ve been known to peruse Garnet Hill and fancy home catalogs for their coverlets, duvets and quilts, like a housekeeper’s porn.

But if I were to drill down, (oh the military officer’s still here!) I would say that my greatest thrill is the pleasure I give my future self upon my return for a nap or a night’s sleep.  When I clean the kitchen at night despite feeling exhausted, the next morning I am so grateful to my last evening’s self.  And so, the morning self pays back in kind. When I make my bed in the morning, I am sending my tired-from-my-day evening self a gift, an especially inviting bed. 

Internal Family Systems (IFS) is a psychological model that recognizes that we all are made up of many different parts, hopefully led by the Self.  This was a relief to me, since I had begun to call this part of myself, the part who had made the bed and cleaned my kitchen, Housekeeping.  Oh, I’d say to B., Can you believe it?  Housekeeping didn’t show up today to make the bed. Maybe time to give them a raise?